Friday, May 11, 2012

Kid shame

So yesterday on FB I posted about how I'm embarrassingly into "Call Me Maybe."  BTW: The Dotytron? - so not getting the appeal.  But as I explained it to him when I played it for him last night: "It's like the perfect mix between vapid and stabs."  He said I was right.  Anyway, a friend on FB was all like, "Have you seen the video?" and I have, kinda.  I mean, I skimmed through it and got to the part where the big reveal is that the guy she's into is actually gay.  BUT I LIED ABOUT IT ON FB.  LOL!  BECAUSE I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT REACTION SHE WAS LOOKING FOR.  So I went and did a little fishing: "is the video bad?" but all she came back with was: "I'll just let you watch it."  SO FRUSTRATING!  I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about the video?!??!  Is it supposed to be hilarious (it's not), shocking (it's not), offensive (I don't think so)?  GAH!  WHY DOES SHE HAVE TO BE SO CRYPTIC?!?!!

On the topic of shame, and kid shame in particular, I'm like, super-sensitive to it.  One of the scenes from that doc, Made In China is like, seared into my memory and makes me cringe every time I replay it in my head (which is more often than you'd think, but that's how deeply I'm affected by kid shame.)  Anyway, this couple working in the sweatshop with their daughter also have their like, 11 year old nephew with them, also working. The scene opens with the Aunt talking loudly at her neighbour, "So he runs away? I just told him his work was no good. It's like I'm not allowed to criticize him anymore?  He's so emotional!" Cut to a new scene of the Uncle bringing the kid back to the sweatshop.  Aunt asks the Uncle: "where did you find him?" and Uncle says, "at an internet cafe."  Aunt assiduously IGNORES the kid, who is standing just to the side of her sewing machine, chastised, but still defiant in that way that kids can be, but not knowing what to do with himself.  The camera stays on this scene for like, 3 minutes, of the kid standing there, wanting to be acknowledged, but not knowing how to navigate and the Aunt doesn't say boo to him and it like, KILLS ME.  Later on you see the kid in the worker's dormitory (which is just a room, with steel bunk beds - no mattresses - and a circa 1980s TV) not looking at the camera and his cousin (the daughter) is saying, "Don't cry, it's okay," and giving him the "parents just don't understand" speech while he wipes tears away surreptitiously because he doesn't want the camera to see.  WORST!  I don't know why it gets me so bad but it totally does.  I guess I've totally been there - having done something bad and feeling sorry but your parents are like, dragging it out and you basically just want a hug.  That's what's so effective about Nanny 911's time out methods.  She always ends with a big hug and kiss and an "I love you" to the kid.  I dunno - I guess I'm just really attuned to kid pride.

Speaking of that, the Dotytron was telling me about this presentation this kid was doing on Eminem where he referred to Tupac as "Pac-too" and was like, "This song is by Eminem....and it features this other guy 'Pac-too' who's old and doesn't make music any more." and there was a pause and some other kid was like, "do you mean Tupac?" So I asked the Dotytron what he said and he was like, "I didn't say anything because he [the kid presenting] seemed kind of embarrassed already."  AWWWWWWWWWWWW.  So cute!  Poor little Sri Lankan kid who's never heard of Tupac.  Gah!

Then he was telling me about how, in relation to another presentation on rock music, the Dotytron was telling another group of kids about how his parents were hippies.  And he's all like, "Well, I guess it'd be your grandparents, but were any of you parents hippies?" And there's a long pause, and then this one kid says, "We're Chinese."  LOL!!!  So gold. 

Dinner was a bust.  So we ended up having breakfast for dinner (two strips of bacon on toast w/ poached eggs).  Ugh.  I hate bust dinners.


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