Saturday night after class we had the Dotytron's childhood friend S over for dinner - I made us carnitas - which are the BEST entertaining meal, ever. It's so easy! The pork does all the cooking all by its very own self and all you have to do is warm corn tortillas, open up some bottled salsa, maybe dice up some avocado if you're feeling extra ambitious, and quick-pickle some onions. Otherwise, pork shoulder slowly braised with garlic and cumin in citrus juice and then fried-crisp in its own rendered fat truly doesn't need any other adornment. My favorite mode is the pork, some pickled onions, and diced avocado squirted with lime. I ate an ungodly number of these, accompanied by a red cabbage slaw that was also extraneous - it was nice to feel like we were consuming some vegetables to combat all that lard.
The next morning I scrambled up leftover carnitas with some eggs and we had it for breakfast, with me again eating an ungodly number. I think we're going on a healthy eating binge for the next little bit - too many meals out this past week.
Sunday was a day of errands and such. We had a bit of a sad moment when I had it in my head to finish up the photo albums I've been working on by tagging them with post-it notes when the year changes - otherwise, it's kind of hard to know when things happened - when you have 10 years together, they kind of start to blur into one another. I found a photo marking a definitive year and then worked forward...coming to the end of 2010 was really, really hard. The photos for the year always end with the Christmas festivities with my family and with the Dotytron's family. Seeing my Kung Kung and the photos of Poppa D broke my heart a bit and made the sadness come. I can't quite believe what we've been through in 2011. It feels like the funeral for my grandpa was so long ago, and yet, he only passed away in February or something. I still can't quite believe that Poppa D is gone - I don't know when I'll start believing it - he was so well, until he wasn't, and it happened so quickly. The past two months feel like a living dream and look - we're midway through November already. I don't know how to express how I'm feeling - how mixed this past year has been - watching the Big Yam grow into the little joy-filled being that he is - a year of laughter and happiness punctuated with so much sadness and so many tears. I'm still in shock. I sat at our dining room table and cried for a good long time, until I looked up and beheld this:
I don't know how we're supposed to reconcile that face with losing Poppa D - the two emotions don't seem like they could possibly exist in the same world. Somehow they do - and I guess that's what makes this living.
We've lost a lot of things this year - my Kung Kung, Poppa D, the Dotytron's license (it's temporarily suspended - that's a story for another day), and, for an all-too-extended period this weekend, the Dotytron's cell phone. The little Boobla hid the Dotytron's cell phone for the better part of Saturday and Sunday, but he hid it in an obvious place and when we slowed down to actually look carefully, we found it again. I'm hoping we can do that with the other stuff, too.