Monday, June 15, 2009

stephen hawking comes up in conversation entirely too often

when the goosetang clan are hanging out. i don't know why. i DO know that when the goosetang gets together, as we did last night, hungover dotytron in two day old underwear, c-hova's shirt, and unbrushed teeth and all, it tends to yield nuggets like this one:

me: "didn't babe ruth have lou gehrig's disease?"
*self reflective pause*
me: "no wait, LOU GEHRIG had lou gehrig's disease"

ahahahahaha! what's WRONG with me? that's almost as bad as my gyno-fail two weeks ago. dr. rei and hanbo hosted us for a lovely dinner of burgers, sweet potato fries, tomato and mozzarella salad, and lemonade from a silver tureen. it was trés soignée. even though we had wanted to make it an early night, we ended up staying for hours and hours talking and talking and talking and basically drawing parallels between wackadoo people in the world and their "he's just not that into you" (movie version) counterparts. ha!

oh wait, i guess i should back it up. why was the dotytron so hungover? because my adorable brothers, s-dawg, c-hova, and the outlaw bro kidnapped him and took him to niagara falls for a night of strippers, too much alcohol, gambling, and a lovely hotel room to not sleep in. the best part of the night (from the stories that i was allowed to hear) was how the outlaw bro was super-excited that across from the hotel there was a brazilian all-you-can-eat restaurant where apparently the women servers dressed in skimpy carnival attire. only when they got there they found out that the servers were actually all men, wearing like, suits, and there was a 3 hour wait. lol! it's funny if you know just HOW excited the outlaw bro would be to be waited on by women in skimpy carnival attire.

so my sister came up with the kids to hang out at my parents' crumbling estate up in markham and i kiboshed my bob villa aspirations to hang out with her. we got pedicures and gossiped and went to hit a marble slab creamery, which just so happens to be beside the pedicure place - pedis were an excuse for ice cream smushed up with your choice of toppings - my sister loves nothing more than ja cold stone creamery and its' offshoots. she's an ice cream hound. i love my family.

then we went to big mouth kee and big d spoiled us with a GIANT lobster and some weird clam thing that was awesome. finally, we got down to the real business: "he's just not that into you"

this movie is EXACTLY what you want in a mindless movie but it's also SIMULTANEOUSLY everything you hate as a man OR woman in this workaday world. it's so SEXIST! offensively so! and it trades on so many horrible stereotypical gender constructions! and the women (and the guys) are SO STUPID! such victims! it's completely implausible that in this day and age people can be such dummies. but then the sad thing is that people can TOTALLY be such dummies. and the sad thing is i totally know people who are so "he's just not that into you" and see relationships that are so "he's just not that into you" play out all the time...i'm just lucky to have avoided that crap. i don't understand how people get themselves into such clichéd situations. it's like, how do you let your life become an outtake from "keys to the vip"?!??! anyway, the dotytron wants to watch it again i'm going to do yoga and go through my files while he experiences the joy/hate first hand.

in other news...i HATE justin long and his stupid monkey face. i also hate and have hated those pc vs. mac commercials since their inception. it's insulting! the mac guy is a smug, self-satisified jerk! how do people not see that? and the pc guys is just a normal, kind of nerdy, schlubby dude. what's wrong with that?!?? if you are ACTUALLY won over by that commercial, i feel like you represent what's wrong with marketing, advertising, youth, and by extension capitalism, today. like, if you actually self-identify with the "cool" that macs are supposed to represent as personified by justin long, then you should reevaluate your life.

tonight for dinner i made a deconstructed version of my pork stuffed deep fried eggplant pockets with sweet chili dipping sauce. basically, i peeled and chunked up eggplant and stir fried it with pork, ginger, garlic, sesame oil, soy sauce, and shanghai choi and served it on top of steamed brown rice with sweet chili dipping sauce.

today i had someone from library school job shadowing me. i should have thought this through some more. my job does NOT lend itself to job shadowing. what am i supposed to do? "this is me placing a phone call to a contact to get the information" "this is me typing in my search string into one of our databases" lol! by the end of it i was SO PARCHED from mindlessly jabbering on for 2+ hours i chugged a million litres of water. i did go for a signature 15 minute run today and when i got home we suited up for some no rules tennis. i LOVE SUMMER! LOVE IT!

in the spirit of LOVING SUMMER! these are my summer jams:

i first heard this tune when we were driving down to visit my sister. i didn't know it was t.i. i cranked the volume on the tune and told the dotytron offhandedly, "i like this song" and he shoots back: *dripping with sarcasm* "OH REALLY? you like this song, huh, RICK RUBIN?" i was all taken aback and he goes, "you know, i used to be so confused...i used to kill myself trying to figure out your taste in music, but when it comes right down to it, it's as simple as having the bass turned up higher than ANY OTHER ELEMENT in the mix" lol! that or an 808. it's so true. i love my sine waves. ahahahaha. anyway, i love t.i's sophisticated ratface, roller skating stylings.

the dotytron just felt the need to tell me that the line "brain so good swore you went to college" is "a bit of a double entendre" i was like, "i know what getting brained means you idiot" lol!

i don't know where madcon came from, or how they managed to weasel their way onto ryan seacrest's AT40, but this shiz is pretty tight. it's cheap, but i'll take it! ha! the rest of their stuff is pretty good...i'm feeling it. it's decent top 40, which is the most you can ask for when you're being bludgeoned to death with lady horseface gaga.

this is my new simile: jason mraz is like bedouin soundclash without the soundclash.


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