uhhhhh...so, there's no delicate or easy way to put this...*cough* ahem...
the performance is off.
it's kind of awesome telling people that because they get all concernedface about it and worry that me and the dotytron are going kaputz. we have not imploded. we just realized that planning performances is NOT our idea of fun. my friend M said, "that's strange, because planning that sort of things seems like PRECISELY the kind of thing you would enjoy" which is true enough...on paper. in reality, we were dragging our feet every time we uneasily eyed the glowing yellow (colour coded for "performance 2009") deadlines i had fastidiously loaded onto the google calendar - they were staring us in the face even as we let them slip by, not done and not caring.
i think i'd like doing it for OTHER people, or for something else...like a baby shower, maybe? but for us, it just seemed to be too much work. and i resented the fact that this was going to be my WHOLE SUMMER spent running around for a day that i knew i was barely going to remember. the first three weeks of august prior to the big day were DEFINITELY going to be a write-off...and i'm turning 30 then! i wanted to be able to have a leisurely, cottage and long-weekend filled summer lazing in the sun wearing sundresses and french braids and birkenstocks and terrorizing teenage boys at the public pool - the diametric opposite of worrying about inconsequential details that would barely register (flowers! making 90 jars of jam/jellies for favours! coordinated invites! timeline for the day! dress rehearsals!) when it came down to it, i wanted only a few things: good food, our families to be around, my best friend, and to look cute with the dotytron.
so there's a new plan, new date. it's now august 1, 2009 (day before my birthday!) we're still going to recognize the day we (re)met as our anniversary...it's more significant to us anyway - this performance day is arbitrary and an afterthought. it's taking place in my sister's town in the states, we're being married by her old judge. we still get to do the fun stuff we had planned, but just on a much smaller scale (immediate family and best friends) and we're having it catered by dinosaur bbq and maybe a drive-in movie, after???. as soon as we decided, it felt like i lost 50lbs...we both felt so relieved and LIGHT! we're going to have it coincide with our annual summer vacay in geneseo, which means golfing at the CHEAPEST GOLF COURSE IN THE WHOLE WORLD (an 18 hole round WITH cart rental is like, $25 lol!) and swimming and stoneybrook and playing in the inflatable pool with our niece and nephew.
i know some of our friends are disappointed...i'm not gonna lie, it probably WAS going to be the social event of the season and it would have been fun...but we can't get a refund on rosetta mcclain gardens and we still have it booked for august 22, 2009. so maybe we'll have everyone we were going to have at the big to-do show up there and squat in the park instead!
anyway, we love you all very much and this is in NO WAY a reflection on how much it would have made us overjoyed to spend a day with all our nearest and dearest. the thought of that is *ALMOST* enough to make the stress, planning, family politics, crystal goblets from bowring, and the fact that it was going to pass by in a blur, worth it. we needed to stay true to ourselves, and at the end of the day, i think we're path of least resistance, lowkey, not a big production kind of peeps.
p.s. if and when we ever decide to procreate, i promise you the baby shower to end all baby showers (ie. featuring a special old skool jungle set from dj c64 and mc'd by caddy cad)