Sunday, February 10, 2008

reason #26848181 why my neighbourhood effin' rocks

- aside -

pps. that jesus jones song below is ALSO about playing witness to the fall of communism and how awesome that is. aka, it's the best song of life.

ppps. the dotytron just read what i wrote about his life and its relationship to gleaming the cube and agrees wholeheartedly. not only that, but he reminded me that gleaming the cube features ASIAN people! here's the plot synopsis courtesy of imdb: "Brian's adopted brother is killed when he discovers that the shop he works in sends weapons to Vietnam instead of medications. To the police it looks like suicide, but Brian knows better so he skates off to investigate the murder himself." wow. this movie is clearly me and the dotytron's story in cinematic form. not only that, but christian slater's skate double is none other than tony hawk. tony hawk is awesome. and by awesome, i mean i saw an episode of mtv cribs featuring his pad and he seems like a good dad and a decent, hard-working, honest individual, whereas when i saw an mtv cribs with omarion (aka the dotytron's nemesis) i wanted to cut his heart out with a spoon.

- resume part of post related to the heading -

i love my part of the danforth. it's right smack dab in the middle where riverdale's upwardly mobile greektown-ness starts to fade into muslim-ville, which in turn fades into scuzzy bars frequented by grizzled, gnarled men and women ravaged by time and cheap, low-grade newfoundland screech and king cans of lakeport.

as i mentioned, we need an outfit for the dotytron that will look good for his teacher's college interview (and that he can use to supplement his paltry "nice restaurant" repertoire). we also have limited time to find this outfit. so on friday after work, i walked along the danforth and popped into this store "five o seven" (all rock and republic jeans - too casual and mad overpriced) and this menswear store, kory's, where everything 50% off was STILL $200 and the staff were snotty, mean, shrunken men of middle age with mass amounts of hair sprouting from their ears. they were also profoundly unhelpful. things were not looking good.

yesterday, i went to a store that's literally around the corner from our house that we call "pants only" (because that's what their awning proclaims) but in reality is called lb uomo. i walk in and talk to a nice, friendly, stylish man named ashraf who's beyond helpful. the only day the dotytron has off is today (sunday) and even though the store isn't open on sundays, ashraf is nice enough to tell me to call him this morning and he'll open up for us (he lives above the store, but still). so i took the dotytron there and wow. the dotytron HATES shopping. this store is possibly the BEST possible place for him. he hates places with fawning, tit-faced 16 year old girls, snapping gum, vapidly nodding their heads at everything he tries on, and relying on a vocabulary of superlatives that consist of "hot" or "awesome". ashraf was SO NICE and so on his game, and so chill. he was completely sympathetic, very professional and straightforward and polite and warm. he didn't try to up-sell us at all. when i mentioned that at some point the dotytron will probably need a new suit, ashraf just said, "sure, when you're ready, come in and we'll find something for you" when you know that if you were at moore's or someplace, those guys would have seized on that statement like sharks on chum. we brought with us some sweaters and a sport coat that the dotytron already owned, and ashraf recommended a plain white shirt, saying that it goes with everything (again, not trying to up-sell us on a different shirt for everything) and suggested various outfit and style suggestions. it was such a pleasant experience. the store has nice stuff, reasonably priced and the dotytron bought a nice sweater, a shirt, a tie, and two pairs of pants which were EXACTLY what we were looking for (cut like jeans, jean material, but NOT denim). perfect! i LOVE my neighbourhood and i love supporting businesses on the danforth run by good people like that. yay!

last night was the bomb. not only did me, the dotytron and dr. rei sort out our italy trip (three little bears, say what!), we had the most hi-larious conversation which again, i don't remember any of. there were some choice lines about how the dotytron turned out so awesome mostly because of the movie ghostbusters, "the movie pi has done more to mess up the concept of math for stupid people than anything else ever" (me), and dr. rei's repeated (tautological) defense of the western canon: "i don't care about art i don't know about in africa" the dotytron: "the problem with you two [dr. rei and myself], is that you don't like things where you have to give yourself over to them" me: "i give myself over to foucault"; we also spent time bashing the social sciences; quantitative, positivist methodologies, and marshall mcluhan (of course) - "the medium is THE MESSAGE? seriously?!?" we also talked about stockhausen, automatic painting and guerrilla poetry (which we all agree is self-indulgent crap), and how the breakfast club sucks (me and dr. rei) and how lloyd dobbler is a colossal loser with no prospects (me and dr. rei).

i honestly think the three of us (and bwong) should teach a grad school course. or at least that we should be recording these convos for posterity...we can never remember the choice lines that make us laugh for ten billion years after.

breakfast this morning was babka french toast with bob evans sausage. i used really bittersweet chocolate in the babka, so the french toast was surprisingly unsweet. syrup doesn't really go with it...i think next time i'd top it with toffee sauce or sweetened whipped cream.

finally, heart is the best female band ever. joan jett? please. chrissie hynde? please. heart has a serious legacy of ace tunes. from the galloping chug of "barracuda" to the soaring snarl of "crazy on you" to the 80s fantastic mysticism that is "these dreams". so, so wicked.



fin.

5 comments:

dr. rei said...

lol!! let us not forget that eric clapton was responsible for the death of everyone. and that our trip to italy is brought to you by mario lopez. LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!
not to mention the hour long dissection of why that old guitar guy's bass playing daughter probably has no friends and is a huge loser.

Chris said...

You're breaking my heart - Lloyd Dobbler is my inspiration, my muse, my main man. "The world is full of guys, Lloyd, be a man". "I gave her my heart, she gave me a pen". The whole "I don't want to sell anything bought or processed" speech.

Maybe it's a generation gap thing. Or that I'm a complete sap.

steph said...

OMG, you are reminding me of all this great music!!! What about the heart song "All I wanna do is make love to you"? Efffffff, that is some emotional stuff. Yo don't totally disregard Joan Jett. She did provide us with a mullet actually worth recreating. We will hang soon, PROMISE!!!

karl lagerfeld, esquire said...

^^^ you're so right, steph...it's totally emotional because that song is about a woman tricking a guy into a one-night stand so that she can get knocked up and have a baby! my sister LOVED that song.

karl lagerfeld, esquire said...

chris: i think it's a bit of column a and a bit of column b and a bit of the x factor (which is me being a stark realist, through and through).