Wednesday, December 05, 2007

i feel like gash

i feel a burgeoning scratchiness at the back of my throat and was completely knackered last night when i came home at 7pm. it felt like it had been a really long day for some reason. my bones were aching, my back was aching, and to top it all off, i had to engage in geneva-style, protracted negotiations with the significant other over who would take out the garbage and pick up pizza from magic oven. in my opinion, the case was pretty cut and dry. i bought and ordered said pizza, was paying for said pizza, had just got home from a long day and felt like trash, and i even threw in doing the dishes (not one of my household chores) into the mix. the dotytron had come home early, done an hour's worth of yoga, and had taken an epsom salt bath and was in his jammies. his argument rested on the fact that he didn't want to put on socks or pants and walk the 3 minutes to the store. CASE CLOSED! i win! i took advantage of the fact that i was writing off school work to send and address most of our holiday cards and wrap some more presents.

i'm *thisclose* to being done our holiday stuff. me and the doytron were going to be extremely unsentimental and exceedingly practical and forgo presents for each other, because well, we're getting to the age where the stuff we really want and could use costs a lot of money (like, you know, a house), and we should really be saving for that instead of passing our money back and forth. but...i LOVE GIVING PREZZIES. absolutely adore it. so, we're going to get each other something small and set a conservative limit. i feel like i've gotten better at keeping a secret too, so the present might actually stay a surprise. this is a moot point at the moment because i don't actually have said present in my hot little hands. i might burst with excitement and spoiler alert the whole thing once i actually buy it.

so, last night we ordered pizza from magic oven. i hate those f**ks and hope they go out of business. it's the most shoddily run operation ever. this is what you get when you do business with hippies. this is what you get when you do business with people who focus more on having a menu with "organic and spelt crusts" instead of making pizzas with toppings you actually want to EAT (ie. 99% of the meat pizzas come with chicken. chicken on pizza is a crime against humanity in my books. you might as well have cubes of styrofoam gracing your pie). anyway, we only order 1 pizza, ever, and that's the harmony magic. it has proscuitto, and roasted garlic and arugala. last time the pizza came without arugala. so i called and complained and got a five dollar credit on my account. when i called last night, the five dollar credit wasn't there. then the guy was a complete, rushed jerk to me, so when i asked him how many slices the "extra large" had, this was his answer: "i don't know, it depends on who's cutting it" CE N'EST PAS ACCEPTABLE. so what are you saying, buddy? that it could be 2 slices, 4 slices, 49? then he HANGS UP THE PHONE ON ME WHEN I'M IN MID-SENTENCE. (i wanted to clarify that i could send the dotytron with my credit card). then, when i saw the bill, the bill said "5 dollar credit" but the pre-discount total for the pizza came to $35.00. you're telling me this was a FORTY DOLLAR PIZZA!?!? learn how to run a business you goons! i was too tired to call and tear them a new a**hole. but now they're on my bad side. which means that i'm going to conduct my signature, guerilla campaign of obnoxious discrediting to make them go out of business. this campaign includes such tactics as walking by the store and proclaiming loudly (but casually) that i'm surprised they're still open after the health inspection violation, or when i'm feeling less creative, a simple, "wow, what ass-tastic pizza they have here, I HOPE THEY GO OUT OF BUSINESS" will suffice. to think that this is what came to supplant the afghani restaurant we used to go to (rip chopan kebab house, rip). i blame 9/11 - people just didn't want to have anything to do with afghanis anymore. it's a crying shame.

today is my long day with night class at school. i'm technically done all my other classes, so i only have night class today, but my government documents assignment is getting finished today come hell or high water, so i'm planting myself in the government documents library at u of t and screaming and cajoling until the work gets done. i'm cautiously optimistic...at this point, i'll hand the thing in half-done to get my stinking b+. i switched around my courses next term because i'm not putting myself through the hell of international documents. i'm taking a sociology of culture (*insert audible sigh or relief*) and another course called "the death of objectivity" (*insert another audible sigh of relief*) offered through the mcluhan institute. i kinda hate marshal mcluhan, but i'll take anything that lets me read latour and heidegger. then i've got a legal librarianship course and then a distance course called "community informatics". i'm not sure what it's about, but it's distance, which is what counts.

anyway, tonight i'm joining my friend evan for a little pho on spadina action. i've been craving my hue style pho like nobody's business (hue style pho, if pho on spadina restaurants will have me believe, means that it's a spicy broth, with more randomized assorted animal parts, and different noodles). it's damn tasty on a blistering cold day, and it's what i'm going to need to revive me after a day spent in the stacks.

fin.

2 comments:

dr. rei said...

is that magic oven guy KIDDING ME?! who does he think he is anyway? probably some hippied out lenny! they BETTER give you your 5 bucks back. straight up wack!

Anonymous said...

There was something in the air yesterday. Myself and a couple of other people just plain ran out of energy at the end of the day too.
We ordered pizza from "mommas". Always a good bet. Magic pan is a rip off for sure.
momma d