Thursday, February 01, 2007

freedom of information

so i grew up in a pretty sex positive household. in the sense that sex was neither stigmatized or overtly in our face, but was just normalized as a part of everyday life, and that it was something that everybody did (including, to my dismay, my parents). this didn't stop my mom from mildly freaking out when she caught me smuggling harlequin presents (that's right, not harlequin "romance", harlequin "presents" the ones that come with extremely cheddar-tastic euphemisms for sex like: "he claimed her and brought her to ecstasy") into my room to read at the tender age of 11. this also didn't stop her from full-on freaking out when she suspected me and my first boyfriend of doing the nasty. in her defense, i was pretty young, and my first boyfriend looked like a total skid. his nickname was "bush" (for his unkempt hair), and he was an lsd-guzzling, off-the-grid, animal-tracker, super-wilderness survival kind of guy. he used to lend me books about his hero at the time, this dude tom brown jr. who goes off and lives in the new jersey pine barrens with nothing but a loin cloth for months at a time, even in the dead of winter. the boyfriend was also the kind of guy who was semi-into native fetishistic spiritualism, vision quests, dream catchers, mandalas, etc. okay, in MY defense, i was pretty young!!!

so the other night we're watching an episode of the daily show, and bill gates is on there, talking about the new windows vista, with it's onboard parental internet screening (read: spying) technology, and i pipe up that i'm kind of against that sort of thing. and the boy is like, "what?!? as if you don't want to screen what your kids are doing on the net!" and i don't think i do. i don't really believe in censorship. my dad, deadbeat that he is, taught me from a very young age that there's no such thing as "bad" reading, and by extension, information, and so as long as we're reading something he never really much cared. i think with my kids, if i caught them peeping some porn or something on the net, i would much rather sit with them and provide a context for what they're seeing. like say, "some people find this degrading because of ___ and ____, or this is problematic because of ___" to which the boy replies, "kids will find the wackest s**t out there, as if you want to be there when your kid is staring at some depraved stuff" and i'm like, "if anything is going to make my kid not want to see that stuff, it's the reality of having me sitting right there next to him, drinking a cup of tea, lecturing about it ad nauseum."

you have to admit, i got a point. i'm all about the hilarious disciplining. so if i was going to censor, i'd probably do it by rigging up an ultra loud alarm to the computer, so when the kid visits a questionable site, the computer screams: aooooooouuuugah! aoooooouuuugah! or "PERVERT! PERVERT! PERVERT!" that'd learn 'em good.

last night's dinner was totally delicious. i made a stir fry sauce with soy, cornstarch, chili garlic paste, sesame oil, water and oyster sauce. it was so tasty on top of the crispy noodle cake; i LOVE chow mein noodles. tonight for dinner, it's my long day at school so i'm packing leftover lentil and kale soup and a smoked salmon on cream cheese sandwich on a whole wheat bagel. i also got this sweet deal on almonds from this lady at my work who lives in mississauga and shops at this indian-targeted super-supermarket, so she got me two pounds of almonds for wikked cheap. score!


Hannah said...

I like the PERVERT alarm idea! Your first boyfriend sounds a bit like mine! OR a few of them! Excluding That Guy.... Of course.

karl lagerfeld, esquire said...

of course! if you get that gig *fingers crossed* we should all have dinner to celebrate!