Saturday, December 02, 2006

shot down

the one of a kind show was kind of weak. my friend d thinks i'm suffering from the sophomore slump, as last year was my first year. but actually, last year kind of blew too. it's so much of the same same same. same cheesy silkscreen prints- will the d.i.y. silk-screening thing DIE already?!? actually, i don't want silkscreening to die, i want all those images of poppies, birds, horses, and the like, the whole royal art lodge/hipster naturalist/parkdale librarian/bust magazine aesthetic to go the way of the dodo. and the rest!!! oh lordy...there's some very questionable "artisans" out there.

i had a fun time yesterday. watching my friend a and how she organized the catering (75 people, all hors d'oeuvres, 15 different kinds plus fruit and vegetable trays), made me realize that i can TOTALLY do this. i LIVE to organize, write down lists, plan for contingencies and cook. so i'm tackling this side business with renewed vigour. first things first: a business card and an aesthetic. and i guess i'll register my business name...and i might need an accountant too...since i want to be able to write shiz off like a mofo. my kitchen at the present is a lot more spacious and well-equipped than a's...and she's kicking arse!

there was this dude at school who was kind of sniffing around my butt. he invited me to a house party. that was his first mistake. so he used the whole: "can i get your email so i can send you the invite to my friend's house party" opening gambit. to which i (naturally replied): "sure. but i hate house parties." so i get the invite, and have no real intention whatsoever of going. i got ambushed in the computer lab and dude's all like: "so are you bailing? you think you're going to come?" (this was after another computer lab ambush on another day when i was desperately trying to organize my overdue paper inbetween classes, whereupon he time-burgled me and talked about clothes and tried to convince me to go to the house party). so i laid it on the line and was like: "ummm...i don't do well at house parties, surrounded by strangers. i don't know what kind of music you'll be playing, it's cold out, and quite frankly, i see quite enough of you information studies people at school, i don't want to hang out with you on my free time too" there was this broad at the next terminal who was looking at me, the expression on her face can only be described thus: aghast. but i was all like, what the crap? i'm just being honest. if you're trying to get down my pants and you can't handle the level of bluntness and honesty and the way it's going to be laid on the table, then you're not made of the right stuff for mercedes g. lee, esquire. furthermore, as IF i'm going to sugarcoat things for strangers. i barely sugarcoat things for people i love! in the end, i wasn't mean about it, my tone was pretty nice (even bordering on the hesitant!!!) i was just showing my cards in signature mercy fashion.

the dude is actually pretty nice and seems to be a decent guy, although we have absolutely nothing in common. i have a few basic yardsticks: if you're inviting me to a house party, we're probably not going to have a special connection. if you're hitting on me at a bar, we're probably not going to have that special connection. if you're hitting on me at comic-con in san diego, you've got a hells of a good chance of getting some nookie.

the thing i hate is this whole ritual of the house party invite. if you want to get down my pants, just say so. don't be all coded and mysterioso about it. the roomie was all like, "but it's sweet! he's going to ask you to the house party, and then you have some drinks, and then you talk abit and then maybe you smooch...that's the way it goes" and the boy was like: "girls usually love the buildup of the flirting and the tension" and i'm like, I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS S**T. just cut to the chase so i can shoot you down already. cuz i can't shoot you down if you're being all backdoor/side-alley about it, cuz then **i** look like a psyscho killer, q'uest que c'est, jumping the gun when he was just trying to be "friends". lord almighty. if he tries again i think i'm going to go with my signature line: "are you trying to get down my pants?" and then we can have it out.

i guess i'm pretty forward. maybe it's a byproduct of my hyper-need for hyper-productivity. any minute wasted in the namby-pamby sniffing of people's butts is a minute of potential productivity lost! i also don't completely hate house parties. i like them if i know everyone, or if i know no one, cuz in either case, i can be obnoxious mcgee (read: myself). i don't like them when i kinda/sorta know the people (ie. say with work associates, or people you're in the beginning of building a friendship with, or friends of a friend). i generally don't like the kinda/sorta category. it's just small-talk chitchat city. *shudders*

we got caught watching the wedge last night on much music. i saw the video for another song from the most annoying band on earth: CSS. they're signed to subpop. the songs aren't even 1/1000000 of a potential idea for a song. stuff like this makes me embarassed to be in my demographic.

tonight i'm making tuna noodle casserole! with egg noodles, tuna, sauteed celery, onions, garlic and mushrooms, and a thick buttery crouton topping. i do it all mumsy style with a can of campbell's cream of celery soup and mayo to mix in. i can't wait. comfort food for the first day of snow! yay snow!!! even though i can't bike to the mennonites anymore and that means a half hour walk to get my naturally raise meat and meat by-products, it's worth it. for dessert, i think i'm going to go with hot chocolate with whipped cream and cookies. the cookies will be these lacy, sugary, oat-based ones called: "mona's mother's mother's favorite cookie" courtesy of the boy's mum. although it appears i've lost the recipe for the umpteenth time and have to bug mama d for it.

fin.

4 comments:

tasha said...

oh, the horror of chitchat! I was subjected to that last night - I went with John to his studio's Christmas work party. there were lots of people there and I did ok for awhile, mostly because some of the people that I already knew made it easier, but after that it got kind of boring and I just wanted to go home. I even had a conversation with this guy he works with about how we both suck at small talk!! haha...that was funny...and yet sad.

Emma said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Miss Emma-Lee said...

But I liiiiiiiiiiike those nature silk screens! hahaha

Leave them be! :P

There is a serious overabundance of them in BUST though, it gets really boring. Everyone seems to just rip each other off for business ideas.

karl lagerfeld, esquire said...

haha...imo, i just think they're done to death. two, three years ago, yeah...but now i just see them everywhere, and i'm personally tired of the aesthetic.

and i also have it out for bust magazine's politics.