a year makes. this time last year, i was facing down fourth quarter madness (it is IMPOSSIBLE to describe HOW happy i am that my employment is no longer subjected to the whims and vagaries of Q4 earnings). this meant that i was waking up at 6:30 every morning, so that i could get to work an hour early and make sure that i wasn't quite so much in the s**ts when service came 'round (this hour was of course, unpaid). i was still prepping while the orders were coming in, and i was getting completely and utterly F**KED every service as we started doing 200ppl and functions in the space of an hour and a half. i was sprinting into the walk-in and screaming (the walk-in is relatively soundproof) "I F**KING HATE THIS F**KING PLACE!!!!!!" at the top of my lungs while grabbing lobster and lemons to make a stupid OFF THE MENU pasta for some bitch who doesn't think the menu at canoe is good enough for her, thankyouverymuch. i was getting reamed each and every day by the chef de cuisine, in front of everyone, because i received a total of 1 day's training on one of the busiest stations in the restaurant, and i hadn't worked the hot line in 6 months, having been plunked on garde-manger when i started there. i was being told that i had "no passion for cooking" whereupon i would bite my lip, and run to the bathroom as fast as i could so no one would see me bawling my eyes out for one heaving minute, and ii would then have to clean myself up as fast as i could, and get back to work so i didn't fall further behind. i was also working another job in addition to the restaurant one, which is kind of crazy in and of itself, and pulling 60+ hour workweeks...and yet...i still do miss it a teeny tiny little bit.
we made a little side trip to soma in the distillery district thursday night when we had time to kill before kaji. we had borrowed the boy's parents' car, and the distillery is such a pain to get to via ttc so i figured it'd be worthwhile. a friend of mine works there part-time...and seeing them hand-dipping the chocolates, the machinery to grind the chocolate made me itch to be in a kitchen again. my plan is to save my osap pennies very, very carefully so that in the summer, i can work part-time for the library and pick up some cooking work with a chef i really admire, and set my own schedule...like do a low-paid apprenticeship kind of thing. i really want to do some bread-baking, or chocolate making, or possibly get back onto the line again.
the plan tonight is veering in two different directions. either we're going to go see prince paul at gypsy, and get crunked to old skool hip hop...or we're going to eat kernals double double popcorn on the couch and rinse out the rest of battlestar and top chef. the odds are 50/50 right now...we'll see how the day progresses. i'm also doing some window shopping with a friend today...and my favorite vintage store in the universe is having a sale that i might have to check out. tonight for dinner i'm trying to make malaysian food. we're having beef rendang which is beef marinated in a thick pastey marinade of shrimp paste, lemongrass, ginger garlic shallots and dried chilies, and then stir fried with toasted coconut and some other stuff to make a thick curry. we're having it with indonesian yellow rice and rotis, and chili black bean eggplant.